I am in love again with another beautiful girl. She is a good nurser and hopefully I will be able to provide her with what she needs in that department. The lactation specialist warned me that women with thyroid disease often have issues producing milk. So I will and am doing what I can for as long as I can. I supplement after I nurse in the evening cause she is still so hungry after I nurse her. I am okay with it. With allisandria I felt guilty every time she got a bottle. This time I don't have the guilt. I know I am doing all I can and all my emotions can handle.
Speaking of emotions. There is no preparing you for having two kids. Pia demends the attention of a two year old. That means keeping a constant watch at her evry move, discipline, and quality bonding time. Bella requires feeding time every couple of hours and of course I want to love on her and admire her. Guilt totally pours over me when I am feeding bella and pia needs something or she is doing something she shouldn't and I get mad at her while I am holding bella. I don't want her to think I am picking bella over her. Maybe her little two year old brain doesn't work that way yet I don't know. I know that this feeling I have is exactly what I dreaded. I hate it. I really really hate it. I love both my children but I am having a hard time dividing my time to my first born. How can I show her that I still love her the same.
Xoxo, Tricia
Speaking of emotions. There is no preparing you for having two kids. Pia demends the attention of a two year old. That means keeping a constant watch at her evry move, discipline, and quality bonding time. Bella requires feeding time every couple of hours and of course I want to love on her and admire her. Guilt totally pours over me when I am feeding bella and pia needs something or she is doing something she shouldn't and I get mad at her while I am holding bella. I don't want her to think I am picking bella over her. Maybe her little two year old brain doesn't work that way yet I don't know. I know that this feeling I have is exactly what I dreaded. I hate it. I really really hate it. I love both my children but I am having a hard time dividing my time to my first born. How can I show her that I still love her the same.
Xoxo, Tricia
Tricia,
ReplyDeleteYour babies are SO beautiful! Give yourself some time and you'll figure out something that works well for you. What I did while I was nursing Landon (or Lexi), was have the other kid(s) sit right next to me, and it was our story time right then. I'd be nursing one, but still had the others close, and we'd read, they'd eat a snack, color, or watch a special movie together. But, I really felt like having them just sit next to me, helped them not feel so left out, and it helped my emotions with the 'motherly guilt.' Good luck sweet lady! you can do it! Oh, another thing, I ALWAYS had to supplement too, so when I did, I'd put them both in my lap, and let the older one feed the younger one. In my mind, it helped them bond too :) YOU CAN DO IT!!! :)
Thats why after two kids I was done. I wanted to be a good mom and two felt like I was still not going to be able to love each one enough. No matter how much we want to give them everything its impossible. Your out numbered. (the rest of my kids were all accidents)
ReplyDeleteI totally understand what you're saying. It's so hard sometimes, especially at the very beginning when the baby is demanding so much attention. Just know that it DOES get better. I'm only three months ahead of you and already I feel like things are so much more manageable. Sophie sleeps a lot more than Savannah so we are able to use that time to be together just one on one. Also, like another person said. I would have Savannah sit by me and I would read to her while I was feeding baby, since in the beginning it feels like all you are doing it feeding, it was a great way to get to snuggle with both of them. My pediatrician told me to let Savannah help take care of the baby. Even though it makes everything 100% slower and harder, I have tried to take his advice. I try to get her involved in whatever we're doing with Sophie. I think it's really helped them bond. She is super nurturing towards the baby now.
ReplyDeleteoh yeah, and both of your girls are so cute!
ReplyDeleteIt's very hard to divide time, but not to divide the love. What you could try doing is whenever Bella takes a quick nap, read a book to Pia. Let her help bring you diapers and wipes for your new baby. Just constantly tell Pia how much you love her and try and have a special "bonding time" with her. Crew had a hard time when I brought Emma home. Now, when she takes a nap we play with his cars and read books. He loves the one on one time, and he's not jealous anymore. Don't worry though, you will do just fine. You'll find something that works for you and your cute little girls. And I love love love the cute little bow in Bella's hair!
ReplyDeleteps- Thanks again for everything you got Emma. There still has yet to be a day that we have not used at least one thing you got her! You're such a great friend!
I'm going to have to ask for this advice with our next one. The only thing I might suggest is to practice deep breathing. This helps fight the tendency to yell.
ReplyDeleteBriggs had a really hard time when I had Hayden too. Just remember that whatever she is feeling right now she won't remember when she gets older. They get over it, I promise. There will come a day when you have to beg them to hang out with you instead of their friends. It comes soon too. Briggs is 7 and he already likes his friends more than me.
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